I've been staring at my computer and practically doing nothing for a few hours. This is ridiculous. I want to do something, but I don't have the heart to do it. Just started to waste my life again... it goes in a circle, I'm trapped.

The wind is a little chilly, today is probably the last day with a bit summerness. I love winter, I love snow, but until then, there's a long way to go - a long and boring way. I am so... dead. So dead.

I'll have to get up early in the morning and get my arse to STC to work... then piano lesson in the afternoon - by then I'll be all numb. Sunday is free, but I need to practise... I am planning to go to the Toronto Reference library sometime next week during spare, I need to listen to some CDs... and most importantly, get a sip of hot chocolate from Starbucks.

Smart is a feeling, and I haven't felt smart since the beginning of the school year... I've been so numb and blank and emotionless, I'm sorry Chopin... something's gotta give.

AH! I cry out loud. I don't want to die. Not yet.